8 and a half

I just finished watching Fellini's 8 1/2.

I've seen it before, but I couldn't tell you when. I watched it then for the same reason I watched it tonight: because it's an acknowledged masterpiece and because I should.

The last time I watched it, I was simply bewildered. I didn't understand it. I was overwhelmed by it's non-linearity, it's exaggeration, and generally didn't understand the plot or anything about it.

This time... this time I understood it. I understood how memory flows into the present, how the past is always with me, the inability to choose and how that inability limits one's capacity to love, the role of fantasy and daydream and self-delusion.... all of it made sense to me.

I'm not sure if that's a complimentary thing to admit about oneself. It's true, nevertheless.