New Day Dawning

I'm feeling a little bit shamed by the wonderful Becky Haycox, who has committed to writing every day this year, and by Neil Gaiman who is celebrating the ten year anniversary of his blog.

I used to update every day, but that slowed, and with the advent of twitter essentially stopped completely.

So, I'm going to try this again.

Be warned, I make no promises that it will be interesting. When I first started keeping an online journal back in... what was it, 1997? God, I think it was. Anyway, when I first started it then, it was because I wanted a record of my life that wasn't just the emo portions.

I'll be posting about my daily goings on, my thoughts on news of the day, trends, and whatnot. You're welcome to listen in, comment, or ignore. If I feel like I have to perform in this space, I imagine that nothing will get written.

So. That's that, then.

--------

Truth of the matter is, my life is much more boring than it once was. The curious thing is that I am not in the slightest upset by that. I'm forty years old. I have a house and a mortgage. I'm engaged to a wonderful woman. I have a dog, for crying out loud. If it was possible to be more settled down I'd be a potted plant.

This doesn't mean that I'm not quite active creatively or that I never have any adventures. It does mean that I am much more likely to stay inside. I'm not roaming around, looking for interesting experiences to have and interesting women to meet. Yes, it's true. Upon reflection, a major motivation for me to be out and about all the time was that I was looking to meet women. How very pedestrian. How very human.

To be perfectly fair, it's not quite as simple as I like to make it sounds. Part of it is age, to be sure. But part of it boils down to contentment. I'm not looking outside my home for anything to make me happier, or better, or more interesting. It also has a lot to do with investment. Each apartment I had, I felt a little more at home in. My last place truly felt like it was a part of me. Now, I have the house. I'm happy to be here, and I'm heavily invested in it. The financial commitment is one thing, but there's also the endless tweaks and improvements I'm investing in, as well as the sheer size of it. In a one bedroom apartment, there wasn't much space or need to interact with the environment. It was easy to leave and return to. With a house... it's different. It's a home in a way that an apartment never could have been. Apartments are launching pads. Houses are not.

And then, there's the dog.

I thought about getting a dog for a long time, but ultimately decided that I wouldn't because of my lifestyle. Dogs are social creatures, and I figured that I just wouldn't be around enough. It wouldn't be right to the pooch. Well, now I work from home, and I find it emotionally hard to leave him alone in it. His panic when we leave is only surpassed by his ecstasy when we return. I know that he's fine. But every time I leave with him pushed up against the window, whining as I walk away... it kills me a little. So, I find even more excuses to stay at home.

We've talked about getting a Beatrice for our Benedick, and talked about fostering dogs for a while to see if it makes a difference for him. Time will tell if and when we follow through on that.